New life... ...

Today is my best pal's birthday, and coincidentally its also a month now since the operation was done. I am slowly getting back my feet to the ground, the antibiotic treatment won't be over until next sat, so November is officially over for me, and all i hope now its for the infection to get out of the way, before i can start getting focus on the new lease of living.

My dear friend mentioned that she was the one always calling me to ask about me, and she was so right; i am lousy when it comes to talk about my problems.In fact, i never like to talk about problems, for i know talking about it just won't solve anything, it'll probably made me feel worse, maybe, maybe not? But of cos, when its all bottomed up and gonna over-flow, i'll still have this dear friend to whine about life.

So ok, The operation is a huge success according to my doctors, it is a huge relieved to the dear people around me. I am thankful! very thankful! I have to credit all these to God, without His grace and mercy, all will not be possible.
One month is gone, i am getting back my strength back bit by bit, and at the same time, i have to cope with the whole new life, everything is different, the real challenge is not the op, is after the op! I have to admit that many many times i have doubts if i can really live on with the changes! The limitations and inconveniences are going to follow me the rest of my life! can i really handle it?

Well actually it's a dummy question, i mean can i handle it?!? do i have a choice? Of all people, i should be the last person to have a second thought about all these right? Sometimes i wish that i can think and feel the logical but without emotions way, yet can a man made of flesh able to behave in such 'perfect' mode?

In anyway, i am just venting my frustrations here, i know as time go by, i will slowly get use to this, i will made the best out of this, i know and i know.!!!
But now just let me whine... let me be weak for a while, allow me to complain; and dun get me talk about my problems, it is a taboo now, cos this is not something anyone can help, i alone has to overcome the psychological barrier. It is gonna take sometime, but rest assured, i wont waste too much time on it too, time is simply too precious.

Oh.. no, i am not gonna be a one man island or a hermit yet, taking time off from the problems is just a mental break for me. i cant imagine being alone for even a second! It kills me when i think i am gonna be a lonely old man! hahahahahah..

This morning sun is exceptionally refreshing, and the breeze is cooling, the morning drive from the hospital is enjoyable.. i like my car! :)

And to my best pal, the perfect woman in my opinion, happy birthday to you! I am sure all the goods things are gonna come your way!